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December 4, 2009

Chenjun
Ya, I had lost my trust.
But first, I have lost my trust in myself.
You know, even I cannot go out,
Hearing you guys calling me go out also
can cheer me up a little.
I did not call you all,
because I felt that you guys can be
happy with yourself. Why must I go out
and spoil your day. Plus, I really don't
like to like call people to ask where
you all are. Because It seems that I am
very thick-skinned. I don't like. Ya,
whatsmore, I hate shu hao, I cannot learn
his pattern. This is not about outcasting,
Just the trust was gone. And you know that
I have a very strong self-esteem.
I always thought that if we are friends,
we will contact each other often to update each
other. Is my thinking really wrong?
Ya, I will emo because of her in the past.
But I had mention, I am gradually forgetting her
now. I think that The feelings is not fully
pressurising me anymore since when I drank to nearly
drunk at YUFEI house. I don't want to have
One-sided love anymore. And the trust I have given
and contributed, makes me lost myself. Ya, I lost trust
but more in myself, who called I am so useless in
many things huh. But if you think I never hear your
advice, then you are wrong. You know how hard I take to
this day, to forget her. Now I finally done it. It's not I who
do not want to hear your advice, but I really cannot solve the problem
even with your advice. I really cannot feel the Care that we used to have, the commotion and communication we once had. But now, I felt that everything is gone. Ya, my temper is not good. But I had tried to change it for very long. Didn't I? I thought you should know because you are 1 of the guys that helped me this few years. If not, I think I may have been expelled or caned again in this school. And, I am already grabbing hold of the fact that I can never been together with her again. My heart is dead, so is my mind. I don't know what to do now. Really. HAIS.




Kar Wong
Although we are not closed together anymore,
But I once mentioned this to you before:
I did not leave the group, but I am just trying
to pull this 2 groups together
so that Our class can be more united.
But, maybe it's my fault for not
making my intentions known. If I is not doing that,
I will not even ask you what is wrong when I felt
that you are moody. ya, You know I love to have lots of people gathering to share the
fun. But I can't seems to do all this Because of me. I don't know is it me or what. But what I really know that It was pain too putting all this down,
putting everything we once love and like and created
down, Like destroying the things we have sacrificed to fulfil
, but What can I do ? Yup, I will forget her completely sooner or later,
since I have forgot halfway. Maybe let me get back my trust in myself first.
And, I will try to be happy whenever I can.

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let it go
12/04/2009 12:01:00 AM